My due date was Wednesday, April 10th. I honestly didn't think he was ever going to come out! I didn't really feel like I was at the end of my pregnancy, and I just couldn't see myself going into labor any time soon.. I guess it just didn't feel real. At my 39 weeks appointment, my midwife checked me and I was only at 1 cm dilated. She separated the membranes and said that should help things get going. She thought I'd at least make it to my due date. But I thought he was not going to come until the weekend after my due date or maybe even later. I really thought I was going to be one of those women days past their due date trying to do everything in the book to get this baby out! I was already making plans of what I was going to have to do. My brother in law is a chiropractor, and I went to see him that week. He just started doing acupuncture as well and he said there is a pressure point that is supposed to trigger labor. I told him that if I don't go into labor that week, I would be coming to see him again to put that to the test!
That week Derek and I went for a short walk almost every night. After we watched conference on Sunday we went and walked around Sugarhouse Park one time. That day I felt like the baby was a lot lower than usual. That night was not fun. I was waking up very often with pains. But they seemed to be more often than usual. We started timing them since I was sleeping, I didn't really know how long I was sleeping for before another pain came. They were about 8 minutes apart. I thought maybe they could be contractions but I didn't know. It was early morning and I just ended up getting out of bed because I couldn't get any sleep since they were so close together. Usually when I had pains at night they would go away once I was up and moving around. This time they didn't. They actually got closer together, around 5 minutes apart. So I knew they were most likely contractions. I decided I would still go to work and just see how the day went. Once I got to work they actually slowed down. They were about every 20-25 minutes. So I thought maybe it was just false labor since they weren't very consistent and it would still be a few days. Around lunch they got worse and were now 5 minutes apart again. The pain was also getting more intense. I didn't want to leave so I stayed at work as long as I could. But by around 3:00 the pain was so bad that if I had a contraction while I was on the phone or helping a resident I couldn't listen to what they were saying and couldn't move! So I left and went to my sister's house. Derek came and met me there.
We stayed at Jessie's for a while then we went and got some Iceberg :) By that point I didn't think I could drive all the way home. Luckily, the hospital was right by Iceberg, so we had to drop my car off there and then we drove home together in Derek's car. I wanted to stay at home as long as possible. So we just watched movies and tried to relax. We were going to go for another walk but when the contractions came they hurt so bad I didn't want to be standing outside while having one. After a while I couldn't take the pain and I wanted to get in a jacuzzi tub which I don't have and the hospital does have!
We arrived at St. Mark's hospital around 8:00 PM. I was only at 3 cm dilated. I kept telling Derek, I don't think I can do this!!! If I was only at 3 cm, how was I supposed to handle getting up to 10! I wanted to try to do a natural birth (which I knew I wouldn't be able to do but I wanted to at least try!) but at this point I knew 100% there was no way. I didn't do any hypnobirthing or lamaze classes or anything like that so I wasn't prepared anyways. I still wanted to wait as long as possible to get my epidural though because I was NOT looking forward to that even though it was going to take away the pain. First of all I hate needles, but that wasn't even the scariest part, I absolutely hate being numb and was scared of feeling claustrophobic with the bottom half of my body being completely numb!
The baby was head down but he was still posterior (facing out instead of facing my back). This caused me to have back labor! I think if I didn't have back labor, the contractions would have been a lot less painful. My contractions were in my back! And my thighs! That was what made it bad for me. I went in the jacuzzi for a while and thought that was really going to help with contractions but it didn't live up to my expectations.
I sort of lost track of time during the whole thing, I wish I noted what happened at what time better. So I don't really know exactly what time or how long it was since we were at the hospital before I got my epidural. I think it was just a few hours. My sister and my mom came and stayed at the hospital for a while when we first got there. It was still early in my labor so we said we would call them when we got closer because it was still going to be a while and it was late at night. But they were there to witness me getting an IV which was like listening to a horror movie. Jessie actually recorded it and it sounds like I am getting tortured! THAT WAS THE WORST PART! The whole time I was pregnant, the main thing I was scared of for labor was first, the IV and second, the epidural. That's why I wanted to do a natural birth, because to me, the pain sounded a lot more tolerable than those things! I was having basically a panic attack before I got my IV. And to make it worse, the nurse seemed pretty new, and had to do it twice because it didn't work the first time! Okay maybe I made her more nervous by how scared I was, but still. They had to call a better nurse in to do it because she couldn't get it. I had huge bruises on both my arms for 2 weeks after I got home from the hospital. After that, the epidural was a cake walk. But I did not enjoy my legs and butt feeling like they weighed 1000 pounds.
My midwife was planning on breaking my water after I got the epidural. While they were waiting for it to completely kick in, my water broke on it's own. It was actually the funniest thing. I told Derek and Jessie, I was feeling a cramp and then all of a sudden I heard a "pop" followed by a gushing, spraying sound. It was the weirdest feeling ever! I told them I think that was my water breaking. My sister said "Or it could have been diarrhea!" hahah. That scared me! I didn't want diarrhea all over me, how embarrassing! My midwife checked and luckily, it was just my water!
At this point I was feeling much better so I decided I should try to get some sleep since it was past my bed time and I was really tired. I think I was only sleeping for about a half an hour when my midwife woke me up. She said that she had been monitoring the baby's heartbeat for an hour and after each contraction, it's dipping down dangerously low. She said they're not sure why, it could be that the cord was wrapped around his neck or that the placenta wasn't providing enough oxygen. She said if I was almost to 10 cm it wouldn't be as scary but since I was only at a 6 and seeing how slow I was progressing since he was still posterior, it's too dangerous to continue this way. She said she thinks it's best for me to have an emergency c-section. I was SO mad! Everyone says this but I was not expecting that at all! My mom nor my sister ever had c-sections and I never thought I would need one either. Everything was going so well, I was dilating good, I was 100% effaced, baby was head down, my water broke, I already got the epidural... this was not what I wanted to hear. She called a doctor in and they were both explaining to me what exactly was happening and why they think it's best. I don't even think I was listening to them very well, I was just so upset, I had nothing to say to them. They said that there was someone else in front of me that had a footling breached baby which was more of an emergency. They were going to figure out what was going on with them and they would check back with me once they knew when I would be able to go into the OR room but it would be soon.
I told Derek it was a conspiracy! I said they must have to have a certain amount of C-sections in the day and maybe they didn't meet the quota so they think since his heart rate is dipping down, I would be the best candidate there that "needs" a c-section. Derek thought I was crazy. I was really, really upset. I prayed so hard that I would dilate asap! I just really longed for that moment when your baby is born and they instantly place him on you and you can have skin to skin contact. I was also terrified of having a surgery like that while being awake! And I didn't want to take longer to heal, stay longer at the hospital etc.
About 20 minutes later, our midwife returned. She said she would check me just to see if I progressed at all. I think Heavenly Father really knows me because I went from a 6 to 9 1/2! I can't express how happy and relieved I was! She said if I wanted to deliver vaginally we were going to have to get him out quick. I was a little worried because I couldn't feel a thing and didn't know how I would be able to push. But somehow I did. And I did really good! I thought this would be the hardest part, but it was easy! I had a mirror so I think that really helped because I could see what I was doing. Within minutes, we could already see his head. She said we were going to have a baby right now! I think I was pushing for 10 minutes, maybe between 3 contractions and he came out! It happened so fast it was hard to take it all in. The moment I saw him as they placed him on my chest was amazing! I wish I could re-live it. He was so tiny and precious! He weighed 6 pounds 9.5 ounces and was 19 inches long. It was 3:03 AM on April 9th. It truly was such a special moment for us!
We stayed at the hospital for two nights. It took us a couple days to name him. We were stuck between Noah and Beckham. I didn't feel completely right about Beckham so we finally decided on Noah. We chose Michael as his middle name, after Derek's dad. Michael is also Derek's middle name. Breastfeeding was a challenge! The first day went okay because he wasn't that hungry but the second day was stressful because he was getting hungrier and it just was not working. I was really frustrated and sad because I didn't think I would be able to breastfeed him. I didn't want to go home because then I wouldn't have anyone to help me. But once we got home, each day got a little easier. We were both getting the hang of it.
The first night home was scary for Derek and I. Our first night as parents on our own. Noah actually had a rough night, and cried quite a bit. But after that night he has been pretty good and only wakes up twice during the night. Well he actually doesn't really wake up, he just starts grunting or making little sounds around the same time each night and that's when I'll get him up to feed him. The hard part is getting him back to sleep. He takes a while to burp so by the time I change his diaper, feed him, burp him, change him again and burp him more if he seems fussy, then swaddle him and get him back to sleep it usually takes at least an hour to and hour and half. But Derek is a good helper when I need him.
Noah is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can't imagine life without him. It's weird to think that just over 3 weeks ago we didn't have him here with us. I am so happy and excited to be a mom, and Derek loves being a daddy. When Noah was first born, I didn't think he looked like either of us. But the next day he looked a lot like Derek. And lately I think he looks a little like me when I was a baby. Everyone comments on his skin color. They say he has an olive skin tone. I wonder if it will last. And he has some hair! Yay! I thought he was going to be bald like me when I was born. It's crazy how fast they change and grow. He already looks so different from when we took him home. We just love him and can't get enough of him! But even though we have him here now, I still miss being pregnant! Too bad I can't have both :)
Some photos from the hospital..
Excited to meet my baby boy!
Meeting daddy!
Our little family
First few days home..
Little smile
Spending time with daddy
His favorite stretching face
Meeting Sophia
Favorites from Newborn session taken at our home - 3 days old..
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